The Color of Summer Page 5
“Oh, all the time,” Max said. “I see other people’s designs and I think, I want that. But whenever I try to decide what I want and where, I come up short. I love the way all the tattoos I have interact with each other, and if I were to suddenly stick a totally different style or a brightly colored piece on myself somewhere, it would look out of place.”
“I get that,” Tyler said. “I’m excited for you to get started on mine.”
“Well, I have someone I’ve already promised my first tattoo in the new studio to. But after that, I can do yours whenever.”
“I’ll talk to my dad, see if he can take June sometime,” Tyler said. “He adores her, and the feeling’s mutual, so it shouldn’t be too hard to set something up.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
Tyler checked his watch and winced. Max could take a hint even when it wasn’t a hint, and drained his beer.
“I need to get going,” Tyler said. “Do you need me to give you a ride back to your car?”
“It’s fine,” Max said, standing with him. “My mom dropped me off earlier so I could have a few drinks tonight. I can get a cab home.”
“I could drop you off….”
“Tyler, my mom lives right on the edge of town. Don’t worry about it.”
Tyler nodded. As they walked back to Tyler’s car, Max called the local taxi company. He’d already learned there was no Uber service in Sweetwater.
“Thanks for coming out tonight,” Max said.
“Hey, no problem. It was good to actually do something with other adults on a Friday night that isn’t working.”
Max smiled. He’d never really paid much attention to Tyler when he was younger. Tyler was just Shaun’s older brother, someone who thought they were stupid, annoying kids and avoided them as much as possible. It was strange now to think that since he’d been back, he’d seen Tyler more than Shaun or anyone else.
Max didn’t subscribe to the idea of having a “type,” but he was definitely interested in Tyler, and he could only attribute about thirty percent of that to Tyler’s good looks. He smelled good too—spicy cologne and something minty—and Max liked the way he smiled.
On impulse, Max leaned in and caught Tyler’s lips in a quick kiss.
They weren’t in sight of the bar anymore, and the streets here were dark at this time of night, so he was pretty sure no one else would see them. The kiss only lasted for a second or two, and then Max stepped back.
Tyler looked a little shell-shocked.
“Max….”
“Good night, Tyler,” Max said softly.
Tyler walked around to the driver’s side of the car and hesitated before he got in.
“Max.”
“Yeah?”
“I’m really sorry if I gave you the wrong impression.” Tyler’s expression was stricken. “But I’m not really interested in dating men.”
“Ah.” Max felt his neck flush with embarrassment. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be,” Tyler said. “I’m not mad or anything. I just thought you should know.”
“Okay.”
“I’ll see you soon,” Tyler said, then got in his car.
Feeling like a fool, Max watched the taillights all the way to the end of the street.
Chapter Six
THE NEXT evening, Tyler heard the car pull up outside the house but assumed it was for one of his neighbors. Juniper climbed around on the sofa and looked out of the window because she was in a nosy phase and just had to know what was going on with everyone.
“Daddy, Mr. Max is here, and he has pizza!”
“What?”
“I said—”
She was interrupted by three quick knocks on the door.
“Stay there,” Tyler said, pointing at the sofa.
June pouted.
Tyler opened the door and was greeted by Max’s sheepish smile.
“This is ‘sorry for making things awkward’ pizza,” he said without a hello. “I can drop it off and go if you want.”
“Don’t be stupid; come on in,” Tyler said, standing aside to let Max into the house.
Max was wearing cargo shorts and a loose white T-shirt, and though it didn’t look like he’d made much of an effort on his appearance, Tyler thought he looked great. Really great. His instinctive reaction the night before was feeling more and more stupid the more he thought about it.
“What are we watching?” Max asked as he followed Tyler into the living room.
“How to Train Your Dragon!” Juniper said. “Hi, Mr. Max.”
“Hey, Juniper,” Max said, grinning at her.
“Is that pizza?”
“Sure is.”
Tyler closed his eyes and tried very hard not to smile.
“June, you can have one slice,” he said emphatically. “Okay? One. Go and grab your plate from the kitchen.”
Max turned to him, silently laughing.
“She has to go to bed soon,” Tyler said in a low voice, willing to defend himself. “She’ll make herself sick if she eats too much now, and…. Look, just trust me on this, okay?”
“I trust you,” Max said. He set the pizza boxes down on the coffee table. “I wasn’t sure if you would have eaten already, but I thought I’d take a risk.”
Tyler had been sure he wouldn’t see Max again for a while after the awkwardness of the previous night. He’d gotten home late and in a weird mood, and his dad had definitely known something was up. Tyler had spent most of the night tossing and turning, replaying the kiss over and over in his mind, and trying to come to terms with how he felt about it.
“I usually call for takeout after June’s gone to bed or eat something out of the freezer. Because I work shifts, our schedules only line up a few times a week.”
June stumbled back into the room with her plastic plate with a picture of a Troll on it. Her current favorite.
“Okay,” Max said brightly, opening the box on top. “We have two choices here for the discerning young pizza lover—veggie supreme or pepperoni.”
Tyler pressed his lips together as June pulled a face.
“Pepperoni, please,” she said. At least she was polite about it.
“Are you sure? The veggie supreme has all the veggies on it. Mushrooms, bell peppers, zucchini, corn….”
“No, thank you.”
“Onions, tomatoes,” Max continued, ignoring her. “More mushrooms.”
June was laughing now. “I like pepperoni better. And Daddy said I could only have one slice.”
“That’s true,” Max said. He opened the second box. “You choose which slice you want.”
June took that responsibility very seriously, taking her time to study every slice before pointing to one.
“No, I wanted that one,” Max said quickly. Then he bumped his shoulder against hers. “Just kidding.”
While Max helped June get the slice of pizza onto her plate, Tyler went into the kitchen to grab the roll of paper towels and a couple of beers from the fridge. When he got back to the living room, June was sitting on the sofa, the plate on her lap and her eyes glued to the TV screen.
“Beer?” Tyler offered.
“Oh, yeah. Thanks.”
Tyler took one of the armchairs and pulled the coffee table closer to them so they could eat pizza straight from the box.
“I love this movie,” Max said, barely paying attention to what he was eating. Tyler’s eyes flicked between Max and June, amused in a way he wasn’t going to express out loud.
June finished her pizza and silently accepted the paper towel Tyler handed her to wipe her hands and face.
“Mr. Max?” she said.
“Yeah?”
“Thank you for the pizza.”
Tyler’s heart fluttered with love for his kind, wonderful girl. And for his mother, who had battered Southern manners into all her children.
“You’re welcome,” Max said with a startled smile.
“Mr. Max?”
“Yeah?”
“What’s that in you
r ear?”
Max touched the hearing aid in what looked like an unconscious gesture.
“It’s my hearing aid,” he said. “I don’t have very good hearing, so this helps me.”
“Are you deaf?” she asked. Tyler winced. It was just typical childish bluntness, but he wasn’t sure how much Max appreciated being grilled.
“No, I can still hear a little bit.”
“Oh.” She looked disappointed. “So you don’t know sign language? We’re learning in school, and I thought I could practice with you.”
Tyler took another slice of pizza and leaned back, not wanting to get in the way of this discussion.
“I know some sign language,” Max said. “Not much, but maybe we could practice together?”
June nodded solemnly. “That would be good.”
“Go wash your hands please, Juniper,” Tyler said softly.
She nodded and ran for the bathroom. Tyler paused the movie again, not wanting her to miss any of it, even though they’d seen it many, many times before.
“She’s a great kid,” Max murmured.
“She really is.”
When she came back from the bathroom, June came to sit in Tyler’s lap instead of taking her spot on the sofa again. He abandoned his dinner in favor of cuddling her close, knowing she was tired after a long day of running around and driving Dana crazy.
They watched the rest of the movie in comfortable silence, and when it was over, Tyler didn’t even need to tell June to go and get ready for bed.
“I’ll be up in a minute,” he told her.
She nodded sleepily. “’Night, Mr. Max.”
“’Night, Juniper.”
Tyler watched as she trudged up the stairs, dragging her feet.
“Are you going to hang around?” Tyler asked. “I don’t think it’s going to take long to get her to sleep tonight.”
“I can stay,” Max said easily.
“Okay.” Tyler stood, stretched, then followed his daughter upstairs.
He relaxed the rules about bedtime on the weekend, mostly because if June went to bed late, then she tended to sleep in longer in the morning. And Tyler liked her company in the evening.
While June brushed her teeth, Tyler did a quick sweep of her bedroom, picking up wayward Barbie accessories and returning them to the Dreamhouse. He was straightening the books on the overstuffed bookcase when June came back in and started riffling through her drawers for pajamas.
“Are my Elsa jammies clean?” she asked.
“They’re in the dryer.”
She whined a little and pouted. Tyler could tell she was tired—she didn’t get grouchy like this very often.
“June. Come on. You have lots of nice pajamas.”
“But I want my Elsa ones.”
“Wanting them won’t make them dry. Pick a different set.”
She pulled out pajamas that were pink and sparkly, still sulking, and got changed. Then she crawled into bed.
“Do you want me to read to you tonight?”
June shuffled down in the bed, bringing the covers up to her chin. “I’m tired,” she said softly. And yawned widely as if to prove it.
“Okay, kiddo.” Tyler smoothed his hand over her hair, watching as her eyes grew heavy.
“Daddy?”
“Yeah?”
“Is Mr. Max your friend?”
“He is, yeah. When we were kids, he was really good friends with your uncle Shaun. They were in the same class at school.”
“Is Uncle Shaun coming to live in Sweetwater too?”
“I don’t know. I don’t think so.”
“Oh. Won’t Mr. Max be sad, though?”
“I don’t think he’s sad,” Tyler said, pulling her blanket up to tuck her in. “He has other friends too.”
“Like you.”
“Yeah,” he said softly. “Like me. And you.”
She smiled at that.
He went through their nighttime ritual, drawing the curtains tightly shut, closing the closet doors and the drawers on the dresser, then sitting down on the edge of the bed.
“’Night, Daddy,” June said with a sigh.
He leaned down and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “’Night, June Bug. Love you.”
“Love you too.”
Tyler turned off the lamp on her nightstand and made sure to leave the door open a crack before heading back downstairs.
“She didn’t even want me to read to her,” Tyler said with a laugh. He reached for another slice of pizza, happy to eat it cold.
“Poor kid looked wiped out.”
“Yeah.” Tyler glanced at the clock; it was almost nine. “This is pretty late for her. She’s in bed by seven thirty at the latest on weeknights.”
Max had switched the TV over to some talent show that Tyler didn’t normally watch. Max had taken his sneakers off and tucked his legs up underneath himself, and Tyler was relieved that he felt comfortable enough to stay. He wanted Max around, he knew that much, even if he was struggling to figure out anything else.
“Thanks again for the pizza. And the company.”
“No worries.” Max fiddled with a loose thread on his T-shirt. “I didn’t want things to be weird between us. You’re probably the only friend I have in Sweetwater right now, and I don’t want to fuck it up.”
Tyler frowned. “Haven’t you reconnected with anyone else?”
Max made a face. “Not really.”
“How come?”
“I guess there’s not many people left. You probably don’t remember, but I was something of a social outcast in high school.” He winced and pushed his fingers through his light brown hair.
“Really? I thought you were one of the popular kids.”
“No, Shaun was one of the popular kids,” Max said, gently correcting him. “He played basketball, like his cool older brothers, and dated one of the hot cheerleader girls. I came out when I was fifteen and liked art and history and was really socially awkward. I had acne.”
“Well, it seems like you grew out of all of that.” These days Max was smooth and charming, or at least he was when he was with Tyler. And he’d come back, even after Tyler had made things awkward between them. Tyler hoped that meant something. He wanted it to.
“College was good to me,” Max joked. Then his face sobered. “I don’t know if I would have come back if it wasn’t for my mom being sick. I guess I needed something to shock me, to remind me what’s important.”
Tyler nodded. “I resented Juniper for the longest time,” he said, a confession that he’d made only in the darkest moments to a handful of people. “I wanted to get out too.”
“What happened?” Max asked.
“I met Victoria. We got married, had Juniper. She left me a few months after Juniper was born, and took June with her. We were still fighting out the whole custody thing when she came back and told me she had breast cancer. From the day she went to her doctor to say she’d found a lump to the day she died was only three months.”
“I’m sorry. That must have been hard. What were you going to do? If you didn’t have June.”
“I wanted to play basketball. I know that sounds like the sort of thing kids say when they’re asked what they want to do when they grow up.”
Max laughed, showing off the dimple in his cheek that popped every time he smiled.
“I was good, though,” Tyler said. “I got a scholarship to college.”
“Do you still play?”
“Sometimes,” Tyler said. He drained the last of his beer. “There’s a big fundraiser at the sheriff’s department every summer, and I play a few games in the tournament there.”
“You could coach,” Max suggested.
“Nah. I guess basketball lost its shine for me. I was never tall enough to really make it anyway.” He shrugged. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to make it about me.”
“No, I get it,” Max said. “Our lives turned out different than how we expected.”
“I brought Victoria back here
when we found out she was pregnant because I wanted to raise my kids close to my family. She hated her parents, so that wasn’t really a problem.”
“You love Sweetwater,” Max said, finally getting it.
Tyler nodded. “It’s family. The whole town is like family now. I became part of the community when I joined the sheriff’s department, and I don’t regret that. I like that I get to raise June in a place where people know who we are. She never got brothers or sisters, but my definition of family has expanded since I had dreams of a big family of my own.”
“Maybe I’ll figure that out too, if I stay here long enough.”
“I hope so,” Tyler said, really meaning it. “This is a good place. There’s good people here.”
“I thought I’d regret it,” Max said. “Even when I put together the business plan and did all my research and made sure I could afford it, I still kind of expected to regret leaving the city. But since I’ve been back….”
“It’s all right?”
“Yeah,” Max said with a huffing laugh. “It’s all right.” He glanced over at the clock on the wall. “I should get going.”
“Okay,” Tyler said, rising with him. “I’m on night shifts all next week, so I won’t have a chance to stop in. But I hope it goes well for you.”
“Thanks,” Max said. “Me too.”
Tyler leaned against the doorframe as Max got into his car and drove away, then closed the door and carefully locked it. He didn’t like the idea that he was Max’s only friend in Sweetwater at the moment. The thought was humbling.
When he went to bed, much later than usual, Tyler decided he couldn’t hide his attraction to Max any longer. He’d been shocked when Max kissed him, and reacted with a defensive instinct that was a kind of self-preservation. That wasn’t really fair to Max, though.
For a long time—the longest time—Tyler had ignored any sexual feelings toward other men. It hadn’t been appropriate, it wasn’t simple, it didn’t make him feel good to acknowledge or confront how he felt, so he just didn’t. His family had moved to a new church after his brother Josh had come out, so at least he didn’t have to deal with listening to how he was going to hell for those feelings, but he still wasn’t ready to confront them.
Then he’d met Victoria, who was bright and wild and funny, and he loved her. He would never deny that. And he’d figured… why not marry his best friend? So what if theirs wasn’t a relationship overflowing with deep passion and sensual romance? They were best friends, and Tyler convinced himself that was enough.